0 thoughts on “Saturday Night Double Feature

  1. They think they have troubles! Try being a full human being trapped in a woman’s body. The “gender” I would like to be doesn’t even exist.
    I’ve pondered the statement that declares people know deep inside what gender they are. I’ve concluded, no, that’s just not true. Both as a kid and as an adult I have often completely forgotten what gender I was as acted as if I were a full human being. Somebody or something has always been around to remind me of my gender status, but that wasn’t an internal thing that I thought about at all. You don’t play baseball thinking I’m a girl, you don’t climb a hill focusing on your gender, you don’t wash the dishes in a feminine or masculine way. You simply do what needs to be done or participate in activities that look like fun, with little or no internal thought about gender at all.
    It’s kind of funny because I don’t believe that gender is innate or that it’s some sort of physical condition, but I certainly do embrace the feminine, whatever the heck that is. I think of it as a set of coping skills that many women have developed over the years, a group of positive things that our male dominated society has rejected, things like intuition, empathy, grace, compassion, and genuine strength. There is that saying that really rings true, “there is nothing so strong as gentleness and nothing so gentle as real strength.” I embrace these things because they are another way of being in the world, of interacting with people, and our dominant culture frowns on them, so I think they must have real value.
    On the surface it seems like a conflict to be embracing the feminine, to be loving women and womanhood, while also rejecting the whole concept entirely. The thing is, I believe the feminine is not some sub category, it’s an integral part of the human race. For me, doing femininity is simply about embracing the human characteristics that our culture tries so hard to suppress. (LOL, and by “doing femininity,” I’m not talking about stilettos or shaving or any of that silly superficial stuff that the trans community and some feminists seem to believe is what defines women.)

    1. “You don’t play baseball thinking I’m a girl, you don’t climb a hill focusing on your gender, you don’t wash the dishes in a feminine or masculine way.”
      So very, very true! Disturbingly, though, I have met people who were absolutely committed to the idea that there were men’s and women’s ways of doing everything — including the activities you mention above. I think it goes something like this: “Men wash the dishes in a very linear, goal-oriented way, but women are more interested in the process, and they approach the soap-scrub-rinse sequence non-discursively.” I avoid all of this by using compostable paper plates. Perhaps I have a fluid, nonbinary household chore identity, such as washerqueer or intersink.

  2. An interesting excerpt from an article about Jorgensen at GLBTQ.com.
    A second generation Danish-American, Jorgensen was born on May 30, 1926 to George and Florence Davis Hansen Jorgensen, and raised in the Bronx in a large extended family. In spite of a genuinely happy childhood–Jorgensen’s memoir contains numerous lighthearted descriptions of her supportive family environment–her self-described “sissified” and modest ways began making her life miserable by the time she entered puberty.
    What can only be called a crush on a male friend during her teenage years disturbed Jorgensen deeply. She had read about but disavowed homosexuality early on, feeling that the term did not apply to her. She later expounded upon gayness as “deeply alien” to her Lutheran religious principles.
    Subscribing to the era’s “deviation” theories regarding homosexuality, Jorgensen never exactly became a champion of gay rights. She remarks in her autobiography, “I had seen enough to know that homosexuality brought with it social segregation and ostracism that I couldn’t add to my own deep feeling of not belonging.” She reports that she even became physically ill when a man propositioned her while she was still living as a man.

    The case is clear: transsexualism as a way to circumvent homosexuality. Reminds me of the tidbits you posted from that one trans forum where a woman remarked she didn’t want to be seen as a big fat dyke, IIRC.
    I’ve pondered the statement that declares people know deep inside what gender they are. I’ve concluded, no, that’s just not true.
    It can be empirically proven to be not true. AFAIK, gender identities are fully developed at five or six years for most. Before, children act in gender-appropriate ways without being aware of their sex in the sense of developing an identity based on it. So, no, you really are not born with a gender identity, it’s a construct. (I repeat this in hopes that it will finally catch on with some people but I’m pretty sure they like their fairytales much better.)

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